Looking for Mr. Right: 12 Qualities of a True Keeper
August 1, 2018
For those of us women who are single but looking for Mr Right, we have a picture in our heads of the kind of guy we’re looking for. We have an idea of the qualities we’re looking for in a man, but our best intentions tend to go out the window when we meet an exciting new person (hot guy). My advice to you is to make a list of the qualities you’re looking for while you’re unattached and therefore unbiased. Then whenever you meet someone that seems promising, you can pull out your list to see how he matches up.
At the top of your list, write out your non-negotiables: The things that you’re not willing to compromise on in any way. Highlight them, write them in bold, whatever you need to do. Then write out everything else that’s important to you but that you may be willing to compromise on. After all, no one is perfect–neither are you.
Keep in mind, you aren’t looking for a perfect person, but rather the perfect person for you. I feel that people sometimes tend to expect the world from their mates when it’s so easy to overlook the things WE do that aren’t so great.
I’ve compiled a list of qualities that are important to me and I feel should probably be to other women as well. Add any of these to your list that you feel are important to you. My husband embodies most of these qualities (he meets all of my non-negotiable qualities), and while he’s not perfect by any means, I truly admire, trust and love him with all my heart and wouldn’t trade or change him for the world. I knew without a doubt that I could trust him with my heart and soul for the rest of my life, and that was probably one of the most important requirements that I had and one that he has always lived up to.
The first 6 items on the list should be evident in the first few dates if you pay close attention. How they act around other people, how they treat other people and how they treat you. Pay close attention to them when they think they aren’t being watched. Pay attention to how they act during conversations with their friends, their mom, wait staff, and attractive women. If they act one way around you and another way when they’re with someone else, BEWARE. People give you a LOT of information if you just pay close attention.
12 Qualities of a True Keeper
They exhibit kindness to:
Wait staff/customer service (tipping a reasonable amount, showing common courtesy)
Slow to anger
They don’t freak out and blow up over small, inconsequential things
They are polite to:
Wait staff/customer service
Showing honesty/has integrity/is trustworthy
They don’t get a kick out of talking about how they ripped off someone, cheated, or got out of owing someone money
They prove to you daily by their words and actions that you can trust them with your heart
They speak respectfully to you. They don’t comment on your body or laugh at you rudely or act condescending
Speaks respectfully of their parents, pastor, and other people worthy of respect
Esteems and values females and doesn’t have a bitter or negative attitude when talking about them
Can admit when they’re wrong and ask for forgiveness
Doesn’t brag about how much money they make, how much money they spend, or the wonderful things they do for other people
Doesn’t flirt with other women
If they does this openly in front of you while getting to know you, they will not hold back after you’ve been together for a while
Has the ability to hold down a job and pay bills
Has a solid work ethic
Is a man with a plan
Willing to get their hands dirty and help out
Willing to help you with things around your house and doesn’t try to get out of working
Is accountable for his actions and faults, also expects you to be accountable for yours
No narcissistic behavior (not self-centered, obsessed with themself)
No red flags
Always listen to your intuition. No matter how wonderful someone tries to portray themselves, if you feel like something’s wrong, it probably is
I hope this list has opened your eyes a little and gave you a few new ideas to add to your list. Don’t underestimate your worth or lower your standards. As I’ve previously stated, no one is perfect–and the perfect guy for YOU may have a few issues, but never back down on your decision to date someone that doesn’t exhibit your non-negotiable traits.
Let me know if I should add anything to this list!